Case #2.21: "Cory and Dean Got Married"

Establishing shot of a charming little church in the woods called Chapel of the Glen. A couple stands at the altar as the minister pronounces them husband and wife. The groom looks pretty young and is sporting a black eye and a butterfly bandage on his forehead. He leans in to kiss his equally young bride. She asks him to wait because she forgot their wedding music in the car. The minister agrees to play it if she hurries.

The bride hustles out to the car in her short baby-pink dress with matching tights and heels. She fishes through the driver's side window for a moment before finding the right tape. Two men in suits and trenchcoats approach her. They ask if the car is hers. No, it's her new husband's car. "So where's your husband?" asks one of the men. The bride shifts her eyes around uneasily.

The men stop her before she can go back into the church. The one in the tan trenchcoat shows her a badge. They want to ask her husband about the murder of the girl's father. The second man runs toward the church. The girl shouts, "No! Let go of me! DEAN!" She breaks free by stomping the detective's foot. 

The second detective follows Dean through the church. Dean slips out the back door and jumps off the porch. He runs away. Dean's bride stumbles through the woods in her high heels, pursued by the first detective. He catches up to her quite easily. Dean has managed to get back to his car. Tires squeal as he pulls away from the church. The detective grabs his radio from his car, requesting backup to follow Dean. 

"Some husband," he tells the girl as he puts her hands up on the car and grabs his handcuffs. We see him toss away the girl's simple bouquet, a handful of what look like daisies. Theme song.

In the squadroom, the rest of the Jump Street crew watches Doug argue on the phone with Dorothy about how he's not the only one with a job. Cap'n Rufus summons Judy and Doug to his office. Doug tells Dorothy: "No, no, no. Don't put me on hold. Don't--" He slams his phone back onto the cradle, growling, "Damn!" He sucks on his thumb, which he jammed in the process of hanging up. Noticing Tom's dropped jaw, Doug calmly says, "Basically, we're good for each other."

Cap'n Rufus tells Doug and Judy to clear their schedules for a special detail. He fills them in on a murder case involving two students from Canyon High: a girl named Cory and her boyfriend Dean wanted to get married. Cory's father objected. Dean went to the house one day and refused to leave without Cory, shooting her dad when he tried to throw Dean out. The Illinois State Police caught Cory at a wedding chapel, but Dean got away. 

Cap'n Rufus is sending Doug and Judy to extradite Cory back to Jump Street's jurisdiction. As he hands each cop a manila envelope, he reminds them that Cory is a minor and they're responsible for her safety. They've been given tickets, an itinerary (is this a tour?), and per diem. They have to leave immediately. Doug doesn't want to take the case. Judy explains, "Trouble on the homefront."

At home, Dorothy berates Doug: "Where did you learn how to pack? You got no toothbrush, no razors." Doug tells her he's in a hurry. Dorothy asks for a little warning next time Doug abandons her. Judy says there's a cab waiting. Dorothy demands to know why they're driving Cory back when it's faster to fly. "She's afraid to fly," Doug say, "You cannot force a prisoner on an airplane if he or she refuses to fly." Judy hovers awkwardly in the background as the domestic squabble continues.

"We've never been apart before," Dorothy whines. Doug mutters, "Except for the 2 years you dumped me." Dorothy doesn't want to sleep without him. Doug reminds her in a whisper, "I sleep on the couch." Dorothy wants to wait for sex until they're sure and the couple says in unison, "That's where we made our mistake last time." Judy clears her throat loudly. 

Doug picks up his suitcase. Dorothy asks him to call every 2 hours and requests a kiss. Judy goes out into the hall to wait, having already seen more than enough. Doug gives Dorothy a peck on the lips before playfully slapping her rear.

An Illinois detective doesn't think Cory will give Doug or Judy problems because she was up all night writing love poems to Dean. There's been a sighting of Dean and they think he's on his way to Florida. Another detective brings Cory out, hands cuffed in front, still wearing her wedding dress. He opens one of the cuffs and holds it up. Doug offers his wrist and gets cuffed to the prisoner. 

At the bus terminal, Judy struggles to open the door while carrying the suitcases. Doug and Cory emerge from the terminal's gift shop, the girl now dressed in jeans and a pale yellow sweater. Doug is carrying a large shopping bag. Judy demands to know why Doug packed so much. "I didn't," he says. He passes Judy a Cycle World magazine, "closest thing they had to Vogue. It was that or Farmer's Alamanac."

Doug reaches into the shopping bag and takes out a yellow Walkman, which he bought with his per diem. "And just what do you plan on eating with?" Judy asks. Doug's reply is simple: "My hands." He also bought a small pair of binoculars. He offers the girls some gum. Judy wonders how much money he has left. Doug looks worried for a minute before answering, "Relax, I'm fine." Cory placidly says: "Excuse me, but isn't that our bus pulling out?"

Judy and Doug grab the bags and start running. Doug bellows, "STOP THAT BUS!" Miraculously, the bus driver listens. They hand over their luggage and get on board. Doug walks up the aisle chained to Cory. She wants to sit by the window, so he has to switch the handcuff to his other wrist. 

An elderly black lady sitting next to Judy turns and asks, "What do you suppose that's all about?" Judy explains that they're police officers transporting a juvenile offender. 

After dark, Doug wakes up from a nap and shouts, "OH MY GOD! STOP THE BUS!", startling all the other passengers. The driver slams on the brakes. What's the problem? Doug forgot to call Dorothy before leaving the bus station like he was supposed to. Judy hisses, "Sit down." He can call when they stop for dinner. Cory asks Doug if he's married. "I'm not married," he tells her, "I'm in hell."

Cory borrows Doug's binoculars and starts looking out the window. She sees the constellation Orion, which she describes as, "my pal. My aunt introduced me to him when I was little." This girl is Luna Lovegood levels of crazy. She dreamily tells him how bright the stars were over her aunt's lakehouse: "I loved that house and now I can share it with my prince." Doug mumbles, "Some prince." Cory pulls out the classic "You just don't understand our love" line. 

Doug shakes his head: "You're only 16. You two are supposed to date, go steady, go to a couple sock hops and the prom, and then drift apart when you go away to college." Cory repeats, "You don't understand. No one does." All Doug needs to understand is that Romeo killed Juliet's father and they'll be honeymooning in separate cells.

At a diner, Cory and Doug are on one side of the table with Judy on the other. Doug reaches across the table to grab fries off Judy's plate. She shoots him a look and says, "You can order more. I'm sure they didn't run out." Judy asks Cory if she got enough to eat. "Yes, ma'am," the teenager says politely. It's time for Doug to make his call. Cory says she doesn't have to go to the bathroom when Judy excuses herself to the ladies' room.

Doug and Cory go to the back of the restaurant where there's a payphone. He places a collect call to Dorothy. It takes less than a second after she answers for her to start screeching about how much person-to-person collect calls cost. We flash back and forth from the diner to Dorothy sitting on Doug's bed as they talk. She whines that she hates being alone in the apartment.

While Doug is on the phone, Cory starts giving him romantic advice: Tell Dorothy to sleep in one of his shirts "so she can inhale your essence." Doug shoots her a sideways look. I don't think I'd take tips from a 16-year-old accomplice to murder. However, being Doug Penhall, he gives it a try.

Doug suggests to Dorothy that she wear one of his T-shirts to bed. He can't seem to make himself say something as sappy as "inhale my essence" and settles for "it's got my smell on it." Dorothy thinks that's a very sweet idea. "Now tell her you love her," Cory instructs. Doug says, "Dorothy, you know I love you, right?" Dorothy does. She knows he has to to get back to work and tells him to call when he can. "Call collect," she chirps, "I don't care." Yeah, because she probably isn't the one paying the phone bill. They say their good nights. Doug thanks Cory for the advice.

As they leave, Doug doesn't notice that Dean is parked across the street from the diner. Cory does and gives him a smile that's probably meant to be sweet and loving but looks more predatory than anything. Dean watches her board the bus.

Later, Cory is now handcuffed to a sleeping Judy. Cory notices Dean's car traveling alongside the bus and smiles at him. Then she dramatically clutches her stomach and says she doesn't feel well. Judy wakes up and tells Doug to open a window, but the windows on the bus don't open. "I told ya we shoulda rented a car," he says. They're supposed to make sure she's safe and comfortable, not try to make the trip as cheap as possible.

"I think I'm gonna be sick," Cory moans, turning her head her escorts won't see her stick a finger down her throat. She lurches sideways across Judy to vomit in the aisle...and all over Doug's feet. He winces and looks a second away from puking himself.

Judy calls Cap'n Rufus from a car rental agency to let him know they'll be later than expected. She reports that Cory is feeling better and "Penhall wants to know if the department will buy him a new pair of pants." Rufus will pay to have his other pants cleaned. Judy tells him not to worry about their budget because they got a refund for the bus tickets and they're renting a subcompact. Doug comes in to tell her that the car's ready.

He asks what Cap'n Rufus said about his pants. "Didn't sound promising," says Cory. Outside, what looks like a Cadillac is parked at the curb. Judy sighs and starts going back to the office to turn it in. Doug tells her he got a good deal: weekend rate, unlimited mileage, and no drop-off charge. Brings back memories of road trips with my parents.

Doug lays out a scenario in which driving a subcompact with the windows rolled up would makes Cory claustrophobic and nauseous again: "And we're kickin' ourselves because we coulda got the full package. She could be lying back in the full, plush velvet interior with climate control, sleeping like a gingerbread girl." Not sure where he got that particular analogy from.

The next thing we see is Doug stretched out across the backseat with his head resting against the door. Judy is driving and Cory rides shotgun. Cory asks what it's like being a cop and thinks Judy must worry her boyfriend to death. Off a sideways look, Cory realizes that Judy doesn't have a boyfriend. Judy explains that relationships are hard to keep going due to her work hours. "There's always time for love," says Cory, "You think Cleopatra didn't have a job?"

Judy says people have been falling in love forever; it's easy to do and not that special. She tries to get Cory to see reality: "If I took off with every guy I ever thought I was in love with...I'd be a miserable, divorced mother of 3." She doesn't need a man to make her happy. Judy points out that there aren't coed prisons and Cory might not see Dean again ever. "Don't bet on it," Cory mumbles.

They stop off for the night at the Moody Motor Inn. Cory is hungry; not surprisingly, Doug is too. He mentions that they passed a few burger places. Cory doesn't want fast food, claiming that's what made her sick on the bus. Cory sees the hotel has a nice restaurant and asks if they can have normal food. Doug is fine with it. Judy isn't going with them; she wants to take a long shower and go to bed after driving all day. Dean is in the parking lot and watches Judy go in the motel.

Corey and Doug walk across the parking lot to the restaurant. She sweetly asks if she can let him out of the handcuffs so they can eat like normal people. "We're not normal people," he reminds her. People watch them curiously through the restaurant's window and Doug relents. He makes Cory promise not to try to escape and uncuffs them.

Meanwhile, Dean gets out of his car. In the motel room, Judy is finishing her shower. When she pulls back the curtain, Dean is standing there, pointing a gun at her face. She gasps and covers herself with her hands. Dean averts his eyes and tosses her a towel, telling her to get dressed.

Doug opens the door to his motel room. He handcuffs Cory to one of the bedposts and knocks on the door connecting his room to Judy's. He calls, "I'm back! Get outta the tub" before going into the bathroom on his side. The phone rings. Cory stretches out to answer it.

Dorothy stops squirting whipped cream onto her homemade milkshake when she hears a woman's voice. She asks, "Who are you and what are you doing in Doug Penhall's room?" The scene jumps back and forth from Dorothy to the motel. Cory explains that she's waiting for him to get out of the bathroom. "You can't wait outside?" demands Dorothy. Cory answers honestly, "No, he handcuffed me to the bedpost." Right after she says that, Doug races out of the bathroom and bellyflops onto the bed, floundering for the phone.

Dorothy starts calling him names. Doug explains the girl who answered the phone was Cory the prisoner. "Hoffs better be in that room!" Dorothy shouts. She demands to talk to Judy. Doug hems and haws that Judy's "here but she's not here right now." 

"DOUGLAS!" screeches Dorothy. Doug jerks the phone away from his ear and we can hear snatches of her talking rapid-fire. "Boy, she doesn't trust you worth a damn," Cory observes. In response, Dorothy screams, "Who is that?!" 

Doug finally explodes: "Dorothy! You listen to me and you shut up! All right? Judy's not here, I lied. And there's a girl handcuffed to my bed. But nothing's goin' on. I'm just doin' my job, you got that? Nothing is going on." Dorothy chuckles and says Doug just has to explain these things to her. She asks him to call when he has time.

No sooner does he hang up than the phone starts ringing again. He asks Dorothy what she wants now, but it turns out to be Dean on the other end. Dean wants to know how his wife is. We see that Judy is sitting at a picnic bench with her hands cuffed behind her back. Dean is calling Doug from a nearby payphone. He wants to talk to Cory, but Doug wants to talk to Judy.

Dean hands the phone over. Judy tells Doug to do what Dean says. Doug lets Dean talk to Cory for less than a minute before taking the phone back. All Dean wants is to be with Cory and offers to swap Judy for her. Doug agrees and lets him talk to Cory again. Dean wants to know if Doug is being too friendly, but she assures him Doug's professional. Dean hangs up. Judy asks Dean if he really wants to add kidnapping to his list of charges. Dean doesn't care and repeats that he just wants Cory back.

In the motel room, Doug yells at Cory that her boyfriend is nuts. She starts to correct him and he says, "Forget about that husband crap!" Cory asks what'll happen if Dean gets caught. Doug guesses 2 consecutive 20-year terms at the very least. Cory asks, "What if he had to do it? What if he was protecting me? What if some guy on the street was choking me and wouldn't let go and Dean had to beat him or shoot him to make him stop?" Doug reminds her, "It wasn't some guy on the street. He was your father." Cory feels like her dead father is still watching her and keeping her away from Dean. 

"Maybe he wants you home and...Dean to pay for what he's done." Doug suggests. Cory confesses to shooting her father. She sniffles and explains that her father choked Dean in front of her. Dad wouldn't stop; Cory shot him to save Dean. She starts sobbing into Doug's shoulder. The phone rings and it's Dean again.

Doug drives the rental car out into the woods and parks. Cory and Doug get out; her hands are cuffed in front of her. Dean shines a flashlight at them from his car, which is parked nearby. Dean appears, leading Judy. Doug tries to convince the kids to give themselves up and cop a plea; they may be able to get a reduced sentence due to the extenuating circumstances. "But we'd still be apart," says Cory. Doug uncuffs her. She runs over to Dean and kisses him.

Doug and Judy look mildly disturbed as they watch. Suddenly, Dean points Judy's gun at her, demanding a 100-mile head start and the keys to the rental car. Cory pleads with him to stop. Dean forces Judy into the backseat and Cory behind the wheel. Doug tosses Dean the keys. "Uh, how do I get outta here?" he asks 30 seconds too late. Dean tells Doug to take his car, but the keys are in Dean's pocket. He drives away. Doug sighs and goes under the hood of Dean's Chevy. He tries to hotwire it unsuccessfully several times before the engine turns over.

In the rental car, Cory asks Dean how long it'll be before they get where they're going. He says a few hours. Judy wants to know what they'll do with her. "We need you," says Dean, "Nobody's gonna bother us as long as we got you." Cory doesn't think they should take Judy to their destination. Judy looks worried at this. Dean pulls over and lets Judy out. Judy stomps her foot in frustration and begins walking down the dark back road, her hands still cuffed behind her. 

Doug, roaring along in Dean's car, spots Judy and picks her up. Once in the car, she wants to call for backup. "We don't need backup," says Doug. He tells Judy that Cory shot her father because he was choking Dean. Doug thinks they deserve better than life in prison, for reasons unknown. After all, he was pretty pissed when the couple kidnapped Judy.

Cory and Dean kiss on the front porch of a log cabin. She giggles as he picks her up and carries her over the threshold. 

Doug has figured out that when Cory and Dean were caught, they were on their way to Cory's aunt's house. Cory mentioned it's on the south shore of the lake. Judy asks how they'll know which house is the right one. "The one with the Lincoln parked in front," Doug answers simply. 

In the cabin, Cory and Dean kiss in front of the fireplace. Dean picks her up again, carries her into the bedroom, and gently lays her on the covers. "Shouldn't we pull the shades or something?" Cory asks. Dean, sounding all kinds of creepy, whispers, "There aren't any." They start kissing again.

Doug asks Judy, "You see the way they kissed? They don't even kiss like that in the movies. Wish I could feel that." "Me too," she agrees. Doug cuts off the headlights as he pulls into the driveway of the lakehouse. Judy starts to approach the house, slightly in front of Doug. He jogs up and stops her, saying, "Maybe they're, you know..." Judy gives him the unenviable task of checking the bedrooms. 

Doug crouches down and walks toward the back of the house. He stops, peeks over a windowsill, and hurries back to Judy. "Let's sit on the porch and look at the stars," he suggests. Judy hisses that it's 4 AM and they've been up all night. She wants to get the prisoners and go home. Doug shoots her a meaningful look. Judy concedes to giving the prisoners an hour alone. "Uh, you better make that 2 hours," Doug says.

At sunrise, Doug is sitting on the porch swing with Judy sleeping against him. The cabin door opens and Dean comes out. "Been here all night?" the teen asks. Doug nods. Dean thanks the older man for letting him consummate his marriage. 

Back in the Chapel, Cap'n Rufus reads something in a file folder and calls Judy into his office. "You got a publisher for this piece of fiction?" the captain asks, reminding me of Art Mullen, "I could see Penhall pulling a stunt like this, but never you. What happened?" Judy argues that Cory and Dean just didn't seem like criminals anymore. 

Cap'n Rufus thinks Cory and Dean have a strong case for a self-defense claim. Cory's father had skin under his fingernails; Dean has a black eye and a broken rib. Rufus asks where Doug is. "Dorothy's been driving him crazy, so I think he went to find some peace and quiet," says Judy.

Doug is on a bridge somewhere, drinking a beer and gazing up at the stars. Given where he's standing, I hope those suicidal thoughts are gone. A nearby payphone starts to ring. Doug turns to stare warily at it. End of episode.